Spammers’ Showcase, #2

You know the old saying, laughter is the best medicine, right? Well, what better way to do that than another installment of the Spammers’ Showcase? In case you’re just joining us, the Spammers’ Showcase is where I share the utter nonsense and barely-coherent prose in the comments, as well as my email inbox from bots or from people with way too much time on their hands, and this is our second in the series. Here’s the first one.

As always, I’ve obscured the identifying details including specific parts of email addresses, as well as any IP addresses or websites they claim in case someone legitimate also uses the same or similar credentials.

Let’s get started, shall we? First up is this nitwit hawking personalized dog harnesses while using an email address similar to my own. Totes not creepy, gaiz, amirite? Said no one ever.

Nice try there, “Byron.” I can find personalized dog harnesses any ol’ place.







OMG, these bad boys come with a LIFETIME WARRANTY, and has an “easy on/off in just 2 seconds?! And we can have them personalized?! Tres cool!

But I wanna know, what do they look like? We as potential customers gotta make informed decisions as to what we spend our money on, and I stress the importance of this to my readers. I want them to get the most mileage out of their money, especially these days.

OMFG, I totally need business funding in my life! Eddie, can ya hook a girl up with some of that?









Why, yes, Eddie, this day finds me well. Thanks for asking! Hope your day’s going just great too. I mean it.

What is this “financial robot” of which you speak, Henry?





Additional income for “anyone all around the world?” Sign me up, Henry! BTW, I’ve never heard of a “financial Robot.” I wanna know moar!

Pretty well thought out, bud.

Whoa, this is pretty long winded, Eric. I wanna turn “surf-surf-surf into talk talk talk!” After a little homework, I see that you’ve sent this message to probably hundreds of others too, with the same exact verbiage no less. You obviously changed it up between websites, but otherwise it’s verbatim word for word. Little word of advice, feel free to disregard as you see fit, but spamming ppl’s inboxes out of nowhere isn’t much of a way to go about drumming up business. Just sayin’.

Cheers to you too, Katherin!

Hey there, Katherin. I’m glad to have helped you out. However, I wanna know how I helped you find this site, how do you say it, Relevant! A girl’s gotta improve and step up her game.

Yeesh, this totally doesn’t sound janky af at all. No siree, Bob!

Cheap proxy? Why, I know just the place for that! This site has a great list of ’em, all for free. Know of anything cheaper than free? If so, send it my way.

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